Goodbye Bxrtley…?

by bxrtley

Ever since I made that coalescence declaration, there was a struggle to write consistently. I created cognitive dissonance for myself. How could I proclaim 2016 as the Year of Coalescence, yet still write personal thoughts not related to shame recovery and the antihero initiative? I couldn’t. And I shouldn’t.

I read that when Steve Jobs came back to work for Apple, he nixed 70% of the product line to focus on just two: desktops and portables for the professional and the consumer. That’s it. Apple Co. lost about $1 billion during his first fiscal year, but then gained a little over $300 million profit the next. And Apple’s uphill journey to success began (again).

After much thought, I’m simplifying my writing platforms to just two product lines:

  1. PublicAntihero.NYC for everything related to my central theme of shame reversal through the lens of the antihero. Blog posts, audio clips, videos of the creative process, publications of finished and unfinished work, drawings of paradigms and concepts, letters to antiheroes—all of it goes to the antihero website.
  2. Private – My personal thoughts, connections, synchronicity, movie reflections that tie into the real world, prayers, rants, sparks of genius and explosions of stupidity—all of it goes into my private journal. If any of these entries relate to the ideas of the antihero, shame, humiliation, restoration, hope, self-perception or personal branding (for the sake of reframing one’s past), then I’ll transfer it to the antihero site.

So, what of this site? I was thinking it would make for a great public scrapbook or Moleskine of thoughts, sketches and half-baked ideas that may or may not end up coming to fruition. I’m definitely not closing the blog (I’m thinking about purchasing a ‘bxrtley’ domain), but why have two public spaces when I can privately document everything I’m doing and then publicly share all of the relevant pieces that coalesce into a singular theme?

Here’s what I’ve realized about myself. I will always find crazy, random or obvious moments that connect and I will always have the desire to critically think through those experiences. I’m hyper-aware when it comes to seemingly random moments that may connect on a deeper level. However, many of those moments end up being transient, “Oh that’s cool” experiences with little value to you as the reader. They may inspire you to search for those moments in your personal life (because they do exist!), but, if anything, those moments help me to keep my mind sharp, as I continuously map and connect experiences together.

It’s time to be more intentional. Time to sift through the “what are the odds” moments and give you the “what is this for” modus operandi. In the meantime, I’m not sure what this means for this little WordPress blog. I’m truly grateful for those of you who actually visit and read. I don’t take that for granted. If I have to go into a readership debt before grossing a profit in user-attention once again, it’s worth the risk. Steve Jobs thought it was. And I must try it at least once. I appreciate you giving me the chance to do so.